Sigh

Today I cleared everything off my desk, leaving only exactly what I need over the next few weeks behind. And, while it's always good to remove a layer of dust, sometimes you find some good surprises and some not so good surprises. Every time I think I've gotten rid of most of the remnants of my past relationship, something else surfaces.

I was sorting through a collection of thank-you cards and found a couple of random "thinking of you"/"I love you" cards from Hallmark's Warm Wishes line. Every now and then, when I'd go over to X's house, I would hide a card somewhere for him to find after I left--in the microwave, clothes dryer, under a pillow, tucked in with a uniform, just wherever I could think of.

Although he wasn't much of a talker, he was a sentimental guy. He saved every card I ever gave him. One year, I baked a batch of sugar cookies that were heart-shaped, and decorated them with phrases like the little Valentine's Day candies. He refused to eat them, and kept them in his pantry, forever on display in a glass cake dish.

I ended up tossing the cards tonight, even though they were blank. I am sure there will eventually be more someone special's down the line, but it just doesn't seem right to recycle them.

And, while I now have a tidy desk, there's still a big pile of random crap on my bed to sort through.