Things I Didn't Think I Would Need to Say

Sometimes discussions with a patient's family members don't go as planned. When there's a large group involved, no matter what gets said, someone will be unhappy. Here's a few lines I said the other night that I wish I hadn't had to:

"The face mask is helping him breathe, but I don't know if it is actually prolonging anything."

"No, I can't take the face mask off. He is awake, and is choosing to keep it on."

"I understand that you are his healthcare proxy, but as long as he is capable of making his own decisions, we go by what HE wants."

"No, I can't intentionally drug him into unconsciousness and then take the face mask off."

"I understand that you were told he had less than 24 hours left, and that it has now been several days. I really can't accurately tell you how much time he has left."

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As life would have it, a few days after this, my parents tell me that they have just listed me as their healthcare proxy in the new revision of their will. I told them they have never been specific with me as to what their wishes are. To this my Dad said, "Just do whatever you think is reasonable." Argh.

Mothering

The other day I got a stern lecture from the charge nurse. The family members of my gunshot wound patient had arrived, so I went back to the family room to talk to them. I introduced myself, got everyone's relation to the patient, and sat down with them. About halfway through, the charge nurse showed up at the door and she did not look happy. I told the family members several times that the patient was doing just fine, that he had been shot through the ankle. It looked like the blood supply was ok, but he was going to need surgery and rehab to get back on his feet. I thought I did a good job, and other than not being able to answer any questions about who shot the guy, the family seemed pretty satisfied.

Later, the charge nurse told me not to EVER go into the family room by myself because I had basically surrounded myself with upset family members in a room with only one exit. Oops. I guess that I didn't really even think about it because the guy's wounds were so minor. We have had family members flip out and attack our staff, but usually it tends to be in situations where the patient is a lot more critically injured. Anyway, I guess it was nice that somebody was looking out for me.